New Tattoo

Roll up, roll up, see the tattooed lady We were mingling with herds of people last week at Suncorp Stadium (the Broncos won). On the train getting there, I espied an attractive woman in her late 20s, wearing a backless, strapless dress held up by natural means alone. While I was admiring the healthy tone of her skin, the fine down at the nape of the neck etc, she half turned to reveal what in…

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No salesmen, hawkers or peddlers

We were at home on a sunny Sunday morning, getting ready for a house concert. Our two musician guests had just got out of bed when two well-dressed men wearing suits and hats came to the front door. They were clutching literature and, from the weighty look of their satchels, they had much to show and tell. She Who Reserves The Right to Edit This Stuff When It Affects Me (Ed.) said: “No thank-you. None…

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To pee or not to pee

I was standing in the ensuite talking to my ol’ fella the other night. No, wait; it’s not what you think. I had got up for a pee in the middle of the night and, not unusually, nothing much was happening. “Jeez, mate,” I grumbled, sotto voce in the ensuite. “Bloody get on with it, will you?” Once it starts, depending how long I’ve been holding on, it can take forever. The worst possible thing…

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Handy Mandy and the Gender Divide

I’m taking a week off to promote our album, The Last Waterhole, which is getting noticed after a national radio interview and a 4-star review in the Courier-Mail. Enjoy this piece by my trusty offsider,  Laurel Wilson, who learned a thing or two about carpentry and plumbing at her Daddy’s knee.   When Fred called the other day, Bob told me that when he picked up the phone he said “You’re lucky we answered. Laurel’s…

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